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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in the "Shoebox" journal:[<< Previous 20 entries]
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04:15 pm
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Okay, ready?
Everybody, on three:
1...2...3...JUMP!
Now we wait.
-=ShoEboX=-
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12:58 pm
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Posted in one location for convenience sake (mine)
Dear everyone who needs to be told to fuck off who I haven't yet told to fuck off,
Fuck off.
Sincerely,
-=ShoEboX=-
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08:29 am
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More disaster relief, more cheap funnie
Grant Bocacioacoisloasaurus of Throwing Toasters has announced that for the next month, all proceeds from the "Laughter Is A Powerful Weapon" Vol. 1 and 2 compilations will be donated toward Myanmar and China relief efforts. These are great comedy music comps, featuring, among others, Luke Ski, Barnes and Barnes, Power Salad, Worm Quartet, Tom Smith, The John Schwartz Project, Raymond & Scum, Carla Ulbrich, Henry Phillips, and Weird Al himself.
You can pick up these discs from CDBaby for a mere $9.99 each via the links below:
Vol 1 - http://cdbaby.com/cd/fmsc
Vol 2 - http://cdbaby.com/cd/fmsc2
-=ShoEboX=-
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08:27 am
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Deliberately wasting your time
Okay, fellow thirtysomethings and other people who are entirely too obsessed with oldschool gamery: On the wall of my cubicle is an Atari 2600 game catalog from 1982-83. See if you can guess which games are being described by the snippets I've posted from their respective blurbs. GOOGLING IS CHEATING.
1. Squash or explode these underground foes while you burrow in pursuit of veggie treasures!
2. Can you make it to the cannibals' camp in time to spoil their lunch plans?
3. Dine with a lady who has a real appetite for fun and games
4. Leap logs, dodge apples and punch out the marsupial-snatching simians
5. Your mission is to destroy the Zylon menace and avenge the mighty Earth Federation!
6. Avoid the gravity pull of the gigantic Space Sun and practice techniques like Hyperspace and Warp Drive
7. Break through the enemy's protective shield and then use the powerful Zorlon cannon to destroy the evil Qotile with a well-placed blast!
8. Pass, shoot, block shots, and dunk!
9. With your four-directional firing and invincible "attack mode" you just might be able to make it to the City of Mystery!
10. Dust off your felt hat, throw on your leather jacket, and uncoil your rawhide whip for the most exciting adventure of your life.
UPDATED UPDATE: These have all been guessed now, but feel free to play anyway, dammit!
-=ShoEboX=-
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07:25 pm
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Well, that was a first.
I just signed an autograph at the deli counter of my local Wegmans!
-=ShoEboX=-
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04:06 pm
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THIS IS A VERY SAD STORY SO DON'T CRY.
Deep in the cornflakes, awaiting the poop,
Covered in radishes spawned by a scoop,
Down near the underwear worn by the pope
Lies a nearsighted octopus blinded by scope.
"Damned if I'm Ernie," he says with a grin,
As he wipes three Greek Irishmen off of his chin,
"For my yogurt has whiskers, my goat has no bones,
"And Fabio tries to molest me with cones!
"Now, as a wombat regurgitates Spam,
"So must I laminate everything graham.
"The cheap dirty flatulent sheep from the moon
"Have tarnished my poodle and varnished my spoon!"
But the biscuit sits watching, along with his elf,
And a monkey named Ludwig that's touching himself,
And soon, as the octopus eats all his art,
Three lumberjacks lick him and draw him a chart.
-=ShoEboX=-
(This is from 1999 - I think I posted it on Pac-Chat or something)
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02:00 pm
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!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Myanmar's government has NOT ALLOWED FOOD FROM FOREIGN AID WORKERS TO BE DISTRIBUTED IN ITS COUNTRY.
100,000 people dead and a million homeless from a cyclone the government didn't warn its people about, and now there are UN planes sitting at airports in Myanmar with food THEY CAN'T DISTRIBUTE TO THE PEOPLE.
Add this to the fact that at this exact point in time, the top headline on cnn.com is "Wounded vets ditch wheelchairs for Segways," and I find myself literally shaking with rage.
Moveon.org has recommended donating to Burmese Monks providing food and shelter for the victims.
Other comments/suggestions are welcome.
-=ShoEboX=-
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09:12 am
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GAAGHGHAHGHARAZZIN'FRAZZIN'GRRR
Dear Ms. Clinton,
Just in case you've been postponing concession to Obama because you didn't yet know the opinion of Shoebox of Worm Quartet, let me clarify it for you:
You already proved to me years ago, by running for senator in a state where you didn't even live (MY state, dammit,) that you care about little except your own power. Any doubts I might have had about this were annihilated by your continual personal attacks on Obama (weakening him for his fight against McCain, I might add,) and now your attempts to circumvent the will of the people by appealing to superdelegates to ignore the popular vote.
Give up.
And while you're at it, go home.
Feel free to drop me an e-mail if you require any clarification.
Sincerely,
-=ShoEboX=-
Supreme Praetor, Worm Quartet
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08:12 am
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Myanmar announcement
All proceeds from the sale of Worm Quartet CDs and merchandise through the month of May will be donated toward agencies involved in the Myanmar relief effort.
I'm not sure which agencies will receive this donation yet, I'm going to do some research into which ones are most involved in this effort (suggestions are welcome) and announce this when I've made a decision.
I can't even wrap my mind around the idea of 100,000 deaths, let alone a government that not only failed to warn its people of the impending catastrophe, but is now delaying humanitarian aid efforts.
-=ShoEboX=-
Current Mood:  numb
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09:17 am
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Y'know...
I hope if anyone ever surprises me in a dark alley and stabs me 39 times in the chest, I'll have the wherewithal to say "Well, hello there, Stabby McStabberson!"
-=ShoEboX=-
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10:02 pm
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Album downloads and online reviews!
Got something nice to say about Worm Quartet's "Mental Notes" or "Faster Than A Speeding Mullet?" Why not say it on the "reviews" section of my brand new CDBaby pages? They're here and here, respectively.
And you can also review "Faster Than A Speeding Mullet" on Amazon! I have no idea why they don't have "Mental Notes" up yet.
Both CDs are also FINALLY available on iTunes, and bunches of other online places. About friggin' time.
-=ShoEboX=-
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09:24 am
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Pac-Man explained...
From teh Internets:
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08:58 am
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Steve's taste in music
Steve amazed me a couple weeks back - I put on Jim Steinman's solo album, and a few notes into it, he asks "Is that Meat Loaf?" And he asked the same question at another point when I played a Bonnie Tyler song written/produced by Steinman. Jayzus.
This kid is serious about his music. He now gets irritated if we're listening to music in the car and we reach a destination before the song finishes - when I shut the car off, he'll say "No, Daddy! Play the rest of the song first!"
Anyway, the following seems to be his current list of favorites, based purely on what he requests when I'm driving him somewhere and what he's bugged Kim and I for on Youtube, with bonus points for anything he repeatedly asks for after the song finishes:
1. Map Light - Luke Ski f/ Worm Quartet
2. Hurricane Fresh - MC Lars
3. The Next Right Moment - Ric Ocasek
4. Signing Emo - MC Lars
5. Here She Comes - The Mr. T Experience
6. Californication - Red Hot Chili Peppers
7. Bastards Of Young - The Replacements
8. Adios - KMFDM
-=ShoEboX=-
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07:49 am
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The great armpit massacre of 1736
Dammit, it's Saturday, and I'm at work. This blows in nine ways.
On the plus side, at least it's quiet. Strangely, few people in the cubes at 7:30 on Saturday morning.
And the coffee here remains magnificent. All hail the K-Cup.
6 hours or so of this. Then I'm gonna go home and spend the rest of the day with my family, cuz I like my family, dammit, and they're CUTE! Even though Steve poured a bunch of water out of his bathtub last night, with the explanation that he didn't do it on purpose, and that he HAD to because the spiders were coming. It's hysterical when 3-year-olds try to lie.
I've also got bird parts at home soaking in lemon, herbs, and bourbon, so hopefully the weather will cooperate and let me throw 'em on some fire later to turn them into food.
Hrm...I seem to be leaping between lines of thought. I think I'm gonna have a hard time multi-tasking this morning. More caffeine now.
Wow! SNMP is a pain in the ass, I'm getting behind on my FuMP submissions again, I need to pick up some eyedrops, and my $1 Target-acquired "Tropical Getaways" calendar really sucks!
How're you guys doing? Please feel free to respond angrily even though this is a perfectly innocent and reasonable question.
-=ShoEboX=-
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10:51 am
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Just out of sheer curiosity...
Am I the only person in teh internets who remembers "The Dallas Quest?"
-=ShoEboX=-
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11:17 am
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Wheee!
It's one of those "I have no idea what I want to listen to so I'll put my whole music collection on random" mornings.
So far I've been hit with Ric Ocasek, Metal Church, M.O.D., Beach Boys, King Missile, Marky Ramone, Go Go Sushi, Ministry, Tom Smith, Nightwish, The Queers, Bach, and Fugazi.
The first person to guess the next band to show up in my random playlist will win a free picture of the bottle of hand sanitizer I keep at my desk.
-=ShoEboX=-
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09:06 am
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Stuff for sale on Amazon
Wow, I certainly have all kinds of crap for sale on Amazon!
Kim's selling some of her old art books, I'm selling some CDs and vinyl I don't need for various reasons, I've got a few RPG-related things up (Paranoia and Star Trek) and I'm selling a bunch of Anime and Manga for my good friend Coffee, since his expertise with the Internet is such if you tell him a URL over the phone, he will type the word "slash" for every slash - and reveal afterwards that he's entered it in the "location" text field on weather.com. Incidentally, there's a long story behind why Coffee has all this stuff, and it's interesting, but not in the way you think.
How was everybody's weekend? Anybody on fire?
-=ShoEboX=-
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09:10 am
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Amazon Unbox
Have any of you people ever used Amazon Unbox?
I ask because they have season 1 of "The State" available for download and dammit I WANT IT!!!!
Apparently my Zen supports whatever Unbox's format is.
-=ShoEboX=-
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01:45 pm
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Fun from yesterday...
This is awesome. And quite nerdy. And awesome.
http://mightygodking.com/index.php/2008/04/21/fun-from-yesterday/
-=ShoEboX=-
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09:54 am
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Workplace Experiment #1 - Progress report #2
This is an update to the great Workplace Salad Dressing Photo Experiment, as described here, with an update here.
First off, it occurs to me that I've never given you lovely people any photographic evidence of the salad dressing experiment ,so here:
( Picture Dammit Picture )
Anyway, updates:
I've thought several times over the last few weeks that I was finally at the point where people were ignoring the salad dressing. But every time I reach that point, somebody else points it out. Almost everybody has the same question, namely the poignant "why do you have a framed photo of salad dressing on your desk?" My answer is always "well, it's pretty good salad dressing." My last visit of this nature was Monday of this week, from someone who generally does NOT stop by my cube, so I've realized that my reach is growing but I still need to wait a bit longer before proceeding to part 2 of the experiment, whatever that may be.
I have also been considering a Part 1.5 for this experiment, namely replacing my current distinguished-looking burgundy wood frame with a "World's Greatest Grandma" frame. Thoughts on this are welcome.
Anyhoo, the big news in the experiment is the unexpected wrench that was thrown into it this morning by way of unexpected audience participation. I recently printed out a few of the brilliant "Garfield Minus Garfield" strips and put them on my wall. This morning, I realized that somebody, using scotch tape and a black-and-white laser printer, had replaced the missing Garfield:
( Another picture dammit another picture )
This is a bit disturbing. It appears that rather than desensitizing my office to weirdness, I am in danger of becoming "the salad dressing guy." I've been here long enough that I already HAVE an identity as "the guy with the weird shirts" and/or "the guy with the Atari fetish," so hopefully that should stave off this attempt at re-identification. However, I'm not sure. Again, any comments or thoughts on what my next move should be are welcome.
Also, Ranch dressing SUCKS.
-=ShoEboX=-
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